It’s been far too long since I’ve written. Chalk it up (mostly) to laziness, but my one (relatively) decent excuse is that I have spent a lot of time reading (those trilogies will suck you in) and catching up on a show that everyone’s been telling me I should watch (Boardwalk Empire). I will endeavor to post more often in the future. Part of my whole “be more disciplined” campaign.
I have completed my first year in New York City. The back half of the year was far better than the front half. And now, at the top of my second year in the city, things are really looking up, despite the fact that winter is fast approaching. (Stocking up on Vitamin D, commence!) I’ve recently landed a commercial agent (!), and I’ve got a manager who’d like me to send them something to look at (!). My goal by this time next year is to belong to one of the actors’ unions, though I think a SAG-AFTRA card will be easier to come by. It’s really wonderful to finally be in a place where I’m not constantly doubting and disliking myself. Not that those negative thoughts don’t still creep in, but I’m getting better at pushing them away. It’s also helping me focus on my product as an actor in a more realistic fashion; i.e., I’m able to be more objective as far as my appearance is concerned. I should go to the gym regularly and eat well not because I’m not beautiful the way I am, but because I should be a fit and healthy performer. When I’m not on my A-game in class, it’s not that I am a bad actor; it means that I should be more proactive in my study outside of class. If I want a Tony someday–and I do!–I just need to take more responsibility to take the steps to get there.
Things are not perfect, but they feel an awful lot better than they did a year ago.
Alright NYC, I’m ready for round 2. Let’s go!